YOU WONT UNDERSTAND ……..

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You wont understand,

the relief that dark sharp blade gives,

which greedily my skin lusts for,

with that silent bite ,

it releases me out of this,

‘frightening curse’,

and with  that drop of blood ,

falls down those unsaid words.

 

you wont understand ,

how goood iit feels,

when it pushes down my veins,

and the pain treats my aches…..

 

you wont understand,

how much relief resides in me,

when i hear the sound of my,

blood tripping down,

yes i cut,

yes it relieves my pain,

takes me to another world,

escapes me out of this cage,

with a smile on my face,

though teary eyes,

i faint on the ground,

yes the scars wont mend,

this state was never planned,

but now it doesnt matter ,

i have gone too far,

and you wont understand….

you wont understand…………………

 

 

 

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Just came alive!

Zygerina's Blog

Im proven wrong everyday,
my esteem is crushed by thier say,
im being reminded from time to time ,
your not beautiful stay behind,
im being said im heartless,
my words are nothing but mess.

Regrets, regrets is all i have ,
they say im the kinda who backstabs,
im the pity seeker,
the wannabe attention.

A girl who’s arrogance n rudeness
are prefrences,
then my ego is crushed n called too super,
im being cut into half n called a seeker,
im being broken everyday, and called too strong.

As my feelings go dry im called cold instead,
when im harsh,rude,cold and arrogant.
When im mean,ugly,devil as meant,
then everyday the sun goes down,
so does ME ,
a helpless lonely girl in me!

With a frosty night comes a cold me,
i ask do i deserve this to stand on my feet!

12 september 2012
Raw Feelings!

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Beauty issues……!

The pointer never Leans back 

as my tear falls on the weigher,

twisting my hair I stand

upright in front of the mirror

i see a fight …..

fight of a nineteen year old,

miss little designers hope,

its so ahead she needs to be ,

sad, but she hates what she is now,

someone she doesn’t wanna be,

the acne marks the breakouts,

the few kgs that she cannot dropout…

for inches she wish she was taller,

takes her sleeps away by night,

the insecurity the self threat,

takes her away from the rest.

 

i am ugly ,

but what is ugly,

as pretty enough seems away by miles….

as it tears her heart thinking,

am I like this for reat of my life?,

 

But she stands tall , fake few smiles,

but she cannot fool the mirror,

it screams aloud,

who do u fool ?

i know it slammed u down,

Beauty Issues………… 

 

i felt like I was the only one who felt this way, but today i met someone similar to me I don’t understand shes so pretty to me but I know u just can’t make them believe so when youre in this state you feel like every negative compliment was true and everybody who is saying Ure  pretty is just being nice or lying…… But I really wanna help… I hate this beauty issues , to me now I have gone too far with them that I don’t even care I’m numb to my feelings about this beauty thing….. But I really wanna say like you are pretty i know u don’t feel like I’m talkin about you but yeah it’s you and everybody is pretty omg I just wanna help I know how it feels and if anybody needs me in case I’m gonna be there , I’m too soppy,…… 😦