Never fade….

So im back on the path of my misery,
Pushed by your ignorance,
It seizes,
Captivates my smile,
Hangs me down ,cries.
And i fight.

Wars that i lose,
Decisions that i never choose,
Laying down wasted,
I hate this muse…..

I know you have tasted,
Too many lips,
To remember the taste of my love,
Broke owned many hearts,
To recognize mine….

But still we play these ugly games,
You kill me with your eyes alone.
And i dont move you a bit,
You dont care if in alive,
And you are my reason to exist.

But i stay to ruin my soul,
With your lying love,
Cause you are my habit,
Cant change,
Living with your lies,
That never fade…..


I Envy You !!!!!

I envy you,
The way you are made,
Filled with insignificant grace,

The way your eyes have this sparkle,
Will make me go blind someday,
Cause i cannot stop staring at them,
Everytime we lay.

The way speak,
What you speak,
Your voice ,
Its makes me a waste..

You know you’ve got me crazy,
Thinking about you all day,
Hating to love you as ever,
Baby i fail……

I envy your sarcasm,
That stands so tall yet sweet,
I envy your pride ,
wrapped in generous pleats.

I try so hard to win you,
To lose myself entirely,
Yet we always play,
To cross over the shades….

I envy you ,
The way you are made,
Filled with insignificant grace!!!!!

In your Mysterious Love!!

What if i only wake up to see your eyes,
To only hear your voice,
To breathe your existence,
I never lie,
So i fall in your arms,
Let me break down,
Hold me up,
So i can shatter down,
Cause i love to kill myself ,
In your mysterious love,
It makes me selfish ,
Yet alive,
I wanna die for you,
Want to feel what its like?,
Destroy my existence,
For the soul i shy,
Let me break down,
Hold me up,
Shatter me down,
Cause I’d love to kill myself,
In your mysterious love……….

Inside ……

Here we stand all alone,
Gazing your selfishness in dark,
Nobody has been here,
We make sure nobody will be here,
A secret so dark!

We see our flaws,
And broken commitments spreading their arc,
It seems to be growing bigger ,
Everytime you ask….

We hide our insecurities,
Under a mask of pride,
And run along with the other fakers,
Supreme or subside?

We taste our alter ego,
And throw the shame,
The real self is never been asked,
How much its been in pain…..

So we leave our innocence and
Climb the fame of mountains afar,
Only knowing its just we as
have become from inside
Worthless Fake and Dark!

Breathing Lies…….

Tell me you love me,
And that you always will,
Make me trust you,
Cause u know i love you too…..

In this lost world,
Why hold grudges for,
The most loved entity,
The love im most ruined for…..

So run your fingers through my hair,
And lie if you have to,
Tell me you love me,
I wanna be where it leads us to….

So if your betrayal kills the dark,
And my dark stays to lit,
You know im too sane to begin with,
I have lost my mind to it…..

So tell me you love ,
Cause your breathing lies,
Are what now keeps me alive………

My veiws on homosexuality.

I am an average muslim girl who’s brought up in religious veiws and morals. I have been brought up in islamic veiws on every perspective of life, however as i grew up unlike my parents i took education and mordern thinking as of my life still staying bonded with my religion, so in my early teens i was a homophobic just like my fam and peers.

But as i grew reading articles, and experience about people suffering everything changed.

So now here i amsuffocated that i just need to let it out

I am tired, disappointed angry and very sad about how its been going through years.
I am here to place my opinion and im sorry if its wrong or right but i Just need to have a say,i have been ridiculous since last night ,
Me and my cousins watched the normal heart last night, the opinions made me so angred on what have we been seeing somebody’s problems their struggles as.
I was angry but it was emotional it makes me wanna cry, our religion is beautiful we as people are depriving the whole gay community of our religion of the serenity and hope of religion, we are Responsible for their hate towards religion, we have put them in that place where they cant seek help. We are responsible for a consensual murder of one’s spirituality and faith in Allah or God!

Who in this world would actually love someone if they hear constantly that a person hates them, Nobody would, then on everyday basis we are telling the gay community god hates u, ??? Where is love is gonna happen then! I know, and i have learnt that allah loves everybody,Allah doesnt discriminate does not narrows down on the path, he is forgiving and kind, if Allah himself says that he loves all , who are we i ask to judge and pull down people out of the line and deprieve them faith hope and religion. Its so sad to see how they feel we are accused for letting an entire generation slip out of faith in Allah and humanity. Be sensible i beg, love everybody, stop judging and forcing them live the life they dont want to live.

Here i am only asking people to not force and hate them for they are beacuse we are the same, if u say , it is loving the wrong person then even heterosexuals fall in love with wrong person at times. We so proudly post “Dont Judge People Cause They Sin Differently Than You” and go on with our narrow veiw of hatred and self pride.

Stop hating under the name of Religion is all i mean. Cause my religion promotes love and only love. No hatred do watever u want to do with live care and concern towards towards others and do not forget that we are not to judge.

And to all the gay men and women i may not know what you’ve been through but on behalf of anybody who may have hurt you under the name of religion i am sorry. Please restore your faith in Allah because i know its the only place that gives you hope and is an friendly company of the lonely… Cause I’ve been lonely and sad and only thing that comforted me was Allah and i feel it helped me it can help you. Cause its always nice to have a place to reach, where somebody loves you unconditionally despite ur flaws ….. So just remember Allah loves you a lot if u have sinned its okay we all do just repent just give yourself a chance to be loved by him, dont force yourself just do it if your heart says so he loves u he really does.